Driving in India

Where do I start? An agent I am training told me last night, "Shelley, if you can drive in India, you can drive anywhere!"
Driving in India is like nothing I have experienced, and until I figured out the biggest rule, I would continue to struggle as a new driver. So, about 2 weeks ago I got it, it just came to me, and ever since then, I've been not only confident, but have been told by a few people that I am a good driver.
The golden rule to Indian driving:

There are no rules!!!

Here are a few tidbits to help you understand Indian driving. Indian road rules broadly operate within the domain of karma where you do your best and leave the results to your insurance company.

In the form of a Q&A I'll attempt to paint you a pretty picture of what I deal with on a daily basis.
** Mom, this is not to freak you out. So please read this with an open mind, and a sense of humour.

1. Do we drive on the left or the right side of the road:
The answer is both.
Well technically, in India you drive on the left side of the road (opposite) of home. But here is the logic behind this theory. Basically you start on the left side of the road, unless that is occupied, you go to the right side of the road, and if that is occupied you just aim your vehicle straight ahead. Trust your instincts. Just remember other drivers are in the same position as you are in.


2. Pedestrians get the right away, right?
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. If you are a foreign pedestrian and you think you get the right away, because that's how it is done at home, you'll get hit by a car, a motorcycle, a scooter or a rickshaw. There will be no remorse, you got in the way. Only proceed when there is no traffic, and if there is traffic proceed through it frogger style. If you are not sure what frogger is, then clearly you have never watched Seinfeld and seen George cross the street frogger style. I thought that was hilarious until I came here, and a sitcom became my reality.

3. Are there one way streets in India?

Yes. But the signs that are put there to tell you that it is a one way street is just decoration to make it seem like there is some order. Go ahead and drive down the street in the wrong direction anyway. You'll be considered stupid if you go the 'long' way.

4. Are there designated speed limits?

HAHAHAHAHAHA! No. There aren't. There are speed bumps and traffic to make you go slow, and when those aren't there to slow you down, go as darn fast as you want.

5. Are there really cows on the road?

Yes, and no. In Hyderabad there aren't so many, but they exist. And cows don't look both ways before they cross the street.

6. What is it like to drive at night?

Have you heard of the game of Russian roulette??? Ya, kind of like that. Turning signals are optional.

7. Then how do you know someone is turning?

Well, you don't always. Most use their turn signal (if it works) and others use their arms out their window or on their motorcycle (like when you ride a bicycle). But that could be confusing too, because that could just be a physical statement of relief on a hot day.

8. Are there traffic lights?

Yes, in some places. But those are stoptional. Really, they are. I have only stopped at a red light a few times. I follow the traffic. If everyone else was going through the red light and I decided to stop, because I wanted to follow the rules, I would be severely laughed at. And I already get enough attention as a white girl on a scooter anyway.

Well I hope this paints a picture for you of what driving is like in India. I hope to take some videos to prove all this to you. But having said all this, apparently the accident rate and related deaths due to traffic accidents are less here in India than in North America. Makes you think now doesn't it? Perhaps order isn't all it's cracked up to be!!